On a mission for mexican guayabera wedding shirts today.........

Downtown LA

Sunrise Cycles in East LA.............

Chopper fever

Arriba arriba

La cucaracha at Motorhead speeds ..............

Switch pole jammers into sunset Blvd

This is where my day off took a serious nosedive into shithawk land.

After milling around downtown and east LA all day on bicycles we decided to head back home westwards. On the road we saw some of the lads skating an epic street obstacle in Echo Park. We pulled over for some hellos and high fives and took a wee breather to watch some stunts go down. Within three minutes there was a commotion at the end of the block. A sargeant from the LAPD was legging it after a bad guy at full tilt . He tackles him to the ground in the middle of the street and both were going apeshit in a wrestles . All of a sudden the cop lets out a panic shriek for help. The bad guy is over powering him and going for his gun. For the story ill name the criminal chap Raymond or Ray Ray for short . The sargeant laddie is in deep shitake at this point . We'll name him Officer Mahony . Im gonna use fake names at this point for us too cos i'd actually like to return to this neighborhood one day. So i'll be Wee Jimmy and my freind can be Larry . As Officer Mahoney is fighting for his life in the street with Ray Ray who looked like a pure nutter by the way in all forms of the word bampot. This guy was grade A psycho. Anyways Mahoney , hes screaming for help and me and Larry completely forget about our day offs and we charge in like Germans at a Hasslehoff concert. I have no idea why i had to have a front row seat at this event . The cops voice was so panic riddled we just put our brains in our back pockets and steamed in to help. The cop had Ray Ray by the neck and was trying his hardest to squeeze the air out of his body, but Officer Mahoney was a tad older and it didnt look like his trusty police academy choke outs were too up to scratch . I went for the dudes legs and Larry opted for the mid section. This dodgy punter was fighting for his life. He was a wild animal. It took all 3 of us to try and contain him. Ray Ray had the power of ten men. I yelled to Ray Ray to chill out and i wished i'd had some snacks to offer him . I think he was hopped up on some drugs i dont even know the names of yet..... It was a nightmare. The whole time were tangling with ol Raymond , he was constantly trying to go for the cops gun. Whole thing was fucked . Hes flaying and kicking so hard he kicked his shoes off as i tried to headlock his awful scabby legs. I was so bummed . I didnt want to get bad blood on my brand new mexican wedding shirt . I gotta get Ray Ray to chill the hell out buck up his ideas. Hes got to take care of himself !!

After a while the 3 of us locked Ray Ray into submission and Officer Mahoney radios in for the cavalry back up dudes to show up. I was scared Ray Ray's veins were going to pop out of his body. They looked like garden hoses under his ashy skin. During all this shite , this little wrestling scene had stirred up the neighborhood and quite a crowd had gathered around us. A few people shouted at the cop. I was starting to worry the entire latino crowd was going to think i was undercover police in my terrible central american shirt diguise . We were absolutely fucked at this point . Neighbors were yelling "thas fucked up mang" "hes got kids mang" "yo thats my neighbor mang" . Whole time the cops screaming at the crowd to back up . I wanted to bury my head into the tarmac so bad . Being Anywhere on earth but here would have been excellent. I'd even have prefered a Dave Mathews concert than this bollocks. Thats how fucked this was.........

The cops cry for back up was answered and within minutes it was like a scene from the end of any of the Die Hard movies. Helicopters , squad cars skidding everywhere, detectives, undercovers, swat . In seconds we were surrounded by more cops than i had ever seen in my life. Helicopters over head are a scary thing in itself. When the moment was right Me and Larry released our grip on Ray Ray. I got to give ol Raymondo credit . The whole "youll never take me alive " attitude was at first suicidal but after his display he had me convinced it was the best route to go. Seconds after letting go of the scariest legs i have ever touched , dozens of cops rolled in and mashed ol Ray Ray into a pretzel. They handcuffed his neck to his ankles while they scraped his skull across the street . I mangage to get these photos off the roll before i melted into the massive crowd behind me .

Seconds after i took these photos it was absolute mayhem. So many cops and angry neighbors. Traffic on Sunset Blvd was shut down. The helicopter circled above us . Once our new amigo Raymond was contained he was dragged off , a rather shook up Officer Mahoney found me and Larry and said "thank you fellas i dont know what i would have done if you hadnt been there. he was over powering me and going for my gun" . We shook hands but he looked like he needed a hug way more. Mahoney had the 1000 yard stare going ............... I bet he drank so many double jamesons that night .

I blew it . That was the perfect moment to ask for the "get out of jail" free card. After we shook hands they didnt make me and Larry deputys but they did swarm us for statements and to release our photos . I turned my shirt inside out and unnoticed in the thick crowd got on my bicycle and pedaled as fast as i could out of there. My mouth was as dry as that one half of Marthas Vinyard and all i could think of was washing my hands .

Last thing i need is to make statments in front of Ray Ray and his 500 cousins in court . No gracias.

Moral of todays story is - dont ever have a day off . Its ways safer at work ............... I was delighted to find out i got no blood on my shirt tho !!!!

Poor ol Ray Ray i will miss him dearly ................ Take care ol chap !!